well, now I know what I’m doing every time a car alarm goes off
I’ve heard this so many times it’s not even funny
Will there ever be a day I don’t hear this?
I’M SO CONFUSED
IS THIS AN INSIDE JOKE THAT 160K PEOPLE UNDERSTAND WTF WHERE IS THIS FROM I DON’T GET IT
the people above you literally explained the joke
The confused person has obviously never been a cashier.
Happy birthday darling! ♥
Put a letter from A-Z in my ask and I’ll tell you 1 thing I love which starts with that letter.
THIS IS CUTE PLEASE
OHHHH MY GOOODDDDDDDD PLEASEEE
"I found him.
I found my soulmate.
Behold my idiot as he spazzes into the sunset”
you don’t know how much i laugh at this every time i see itthis hits my dash about three times a week and i laugh every time.
Sterek Week Day 5: Sterek AU
Suits AU (suggested by: stubblehale
Derek Hale does not want or need to hire a new associate. He’s the best goddamn closer in this city, and the last thing he needs is some spoiled, green, Harvard kid getting under foot while he’s working his magic. Of course Stiles is no spoiled, green, Harvard kid. Emphasis on the Harvard. But Derek can immediatel sense something about the kid. Ignoring the giant stash of weed that came tumbling out of his briefcase, Stiles is clearly a genius, eidetic memory aside, this kid is really bright. Something special. Derek had to have him… as his associate.
Derek’s first order of business was to get him out of that god awful suit. Skinny ties are a plague on humanity and must be eradicated at all costs in Derek’s not so humble opinion, and Stiles seemed to have an unhealthy addiction to them. He got rid of that, and his weed habit too. His mind was too brilliant, too sharp for him to be allowed to dull his intellect with that stuff. Also, Peter was always on the hunt. Always looking for a new way to get one up on Derek (his jealousy was almost comical), and what better way than by tormenting his associate. When Stiles told Derek about Peters harassment though he experienced a rage that he was frankly unaccustomed to.
Of course keeping their secret turns into a near full time job too, and Stiles stubborn insistence on sticking up for the little guy puts them both in quite a few tough situations, but Derek is coming to realize that taking a risk on this spastic, bleeding heart, wannabe drug-dealer, genius, kid was the best decision he ever made. Because he more than respects Stiles mind, he realizes, he more than admires his fierce loyalty, and wicked sense of humor. Derek… Derek fucking adores him. Stiles is beautiful and perfect. The perfect foil for him. Stiles is soft where Derek is hard, he’s the perfect counter weight to him, not just in the office, but all the time. He challenges Derek in a way he’s never been challenged before. He makes Derek a better lawyer, and a better man.
He starts feeling excited to get to work again, just so he can banter with Stiles. Praise him for a job well done and watch his cheeks flush with pride.
He’s got it bad.
His assistant, Lydia didn’t even have to tell him about himself this time (she did anyway, and then politely informed him that is he didn’t do something about it she was going to destroy him), She was probably right, Derek had taken to just grinning stupidly at his giant wall of windows every time his mind wandered to thoughts of Stiles. It was really effecting his productivity.
So, in the interest of protecting his clients interests, Derek decides to put in a little overtime. He shows up at Stiles’ shitty apartment, and bangs on the door. Stiles answers, rumpled and bleary eyed.
"Do you know what time it is?" Stiles grumped. And okay maybe Derek had a few drinks before showing up here. Who could blame him.
"Derek, it;s 3am. We have work in a few hours. What is going on?" He pouted and it was the most adorable thing Derek had ever seen,
Derek just continued to grin at him.. both of him. He loosened his tie, he was starting to sweat (Derek Hale does hot sweat when he’s nervous, never!), he just had to do it and damn the consequences. Stiles was looking at him curiously, he was clearly fighting his usual ever present smirk. His eyes lit up and Derek just knew that Stiles knew what he’d come here to do. He is a genius after all.
"I’m gonna kiss you now." Derek managed to get out before gracefully leaning forward and grabbing Stiles around the waist. (I’m never letting go, he thought.)
"Oh! ok-murgh" was all Stiles could say before Derek pushed them both inside and kicked the door shut behind them.
They didn’t make it into work the next day. Lydia was all to happy to cover for them.